Discover simple and practical mindfulness for daily life.
When a child is learning how to walk and falls down 50 times, they never think to themselves ‘Maybe this is not for me.’Johanna Burkhardt
You know how we often try doing something new and then when the success doesn’t come as soon (or easily) as we expected, we give up on the thing altogether and tell ourselves that either a.) we’re not good enough in this, or b.) that this cannot be for us as it doesn’t come easy and fast.
The truth is, with a vast majority of skills to develop, or our interests and hobbies to become a passion, it takes time and practice for it to happen. They rarely become strong skills in a short while without much of our effort. It’s practice, strong will, and determination that makes us succeed, not a lack of it. And certainly not giving up before we give our all to it.
If you ever feel like giving up before trying, think of the quote above.
All the doors open inwards.Martin Vlach
The key to knowing ourselves lies within us. If we want to know more about who we are, we need to be with ourselves more. It’s not the outside world that tells us the right answers to what we want and need, it all hides in our own being. And if keep drawing answers for ourselves from the outside, it often leaves us feeling empty, drained, and unfulfilled. Because nothing external can ever give us joy and satisfaction, these all too reside within ourselves.
All the doors open inwards — all the answers, realizations, and truths are already there with us. The happiness, joy, love, and personal fulfillment is to be found through you, within you. The secret is knowing how to ask for it.
You are a unique individual, with a unique way of seeing the world, unique personality, talents, skills, life experiences, life purpose given by your unique soul, mind, and body.
Nobody else can make good decisions for you other than yourself. No one else can read and respond to the voice of your soul. And it’s only you who can connect to and decipher this voice and let yourself be guided by it.
In order for the light to shine so brightly, the darkness must be present.Francis Bacon
Darkness is often a term way misunderstood. We learned to see it as something negative and bad, therefore we keep this notion and avoid anything that’d resemble it. We fear it, reject it, run away from it or hide.
But, if you look at it, we all come from darkness and darkness is what gives us life. Life in the whole universe was created out of darkness, therefore, darkness is not something dreadful, on the contrary, it’s the source of all being, a source of life, and source of our consciousness.
My old teachers from Kabbalah used to say that darkness has the greatest potential to show us the light within us. We can indeed only see the light shine brightly in the darkness, and with an awareness of it. It’s the darkness that enables us to recognize where and what the true light is. In other words, if we didn’t have the darkness, we’d not know the light.
We’d not be our best selves if we’ve not experienced the dark moments — dark days, dark parts of ourselves and we’d not appreciate the good things either. Only by knowing both parts of dual reality enables us to choose what we truly resonate with and want in our lives.
If we don’t know how darkness feels — such as experiencing a lack of love or joy, we’d hardly know and value the profusion of it. Only by knowing the darkness, we can choose the light to shine brightly.
Situations that cause painful experiences and memories within you should be acknowledged as gifts. Without them, you’d not be aware of your limitations and mistakes, and you’d not get an opportunity to get rid of them. And to gain inner strength, wisdom, vision, joy, and love.Martin Vlach
If, for instance, we’d not have that painful argument with our parents, partner, or friends, we’d not become aware of the things we do wrong and so wouldn’t they. We’d not know how it feels to argue and whether reacting in a certain way is good and necessary for both parties. We’d not learn how to say certain things with peace so we don’t hurt and harm each other unnecessarily.
We’d not gain an awareness of a better way to deal with problems if we don’t experience a bad approach first. We’d not sympathize with our loved ones and value the harmony of relationships if we don’t experience the pain of hurtful words and disagreements, and often our own failure to stay kind and considerate.
Often, situations that carry a painful experience in them create opportunities for us to improve, and get rid of our wrong beliefs and patterns that are unhealthy. They show us what we don’t want to see in our life anymore, what we want to better, and ultimately, what we desire for our lives and being. And that, helps us to know ourselves better and to become better, stronger, wiser, and more authentic humans.
Whatever it is that you focus on, it will become more and more common part of your reality.Ruediger Schache
Perhaps you heard about the famous law of Attraction theory that goes like ‘focus on abundance attracts abundance, focus on lack, attracts lack, focus on health attracts health, focus on illness, attracts illness, and focus on negativity attracts just that’. It basically means that when we concentrate on certain energy, we’re left to attract more and more of the same thing as a reflection of what we’re investing in in form of our emotions, thoughts, and actions.
Psychology refers to this phenomena as a self-fulfilling prophecy. It basically means that an originally false belief or expectation leads to its own confirmation. It’s due to the person believing in something and focusing on it, that their behaviour aligns to fulfill their belief and make the thing they expect to come true.
The fact is, if we focus on something such as how unsuccessful we are or what a lack of love and money there is in our lives, we’re filling our lives with this emotion and energy of lack and unhappiness. Unhappiness and frustration don’t produce happiness and fulfillment, on the contrary, only more of what we think and feel.
The key to seeing more of what we want in our lives is in focusing on what we want to see in our lives, not its opposite. If you want to be successful, productive, loved, healthy, and joyful, focus on what makes you these things — on success, love, health, joy, and productivity.
It’s very true that what we seek is seeking us and when we put our energy into creating that, the universe responds by providing us with the tools and pathways to reach our desired goal.
The only person you should try to better than is the person you were yesterday.Matty Mullins
When it comes to living our lives mindfully, and especially when a new challenge comes our way, it’s good to focus on the things that we can control, impact and, if desired, change. And not on those that we hardly have any control or influence over. In psychological theory called ‘Locus of control’ there are three levels of influence:
- Full control — things that we can directly control and influence.
- Partial control — things that we can somehow influence.
- No control — things that we have no control and influence over.
It’s important to recognize that our perception of what we can control strongly influences what we do and what we feel about situations in our life.Joeel Rivera
Different people have a different perception about what they can influence and control based on how psychologically healthy their beliefs are. Some might think that external circumstances have full control over their lives and so they’re completely disempowered. Others, on the contrary, might believe that they have absolute control over everything that happens in their lives — they’re empowered to an unrealistic level.
The truth that lies in the middle, is that we have full control over things that are directly related to us — that’s ourselves and ourselves only. Not other people around us, not the external circumstances and what’s going to happen in the world tomorrow. If there’s one person that we’re fully capable of impacting, it’s ourselves — our thoughts, emotions, actions, beliefs, choices, etc.
There is so much about my fate that I cannot control, but other things do fall under my jurisdiction. I can decide how I spend my time, whom I interact with, whom I share my body and life and money and energy with. I can select what I can read and eat and study. I can choose how I’m going to regard unfortunate circumstances in my life-whether I will see them as curses or opportunities. I can choose my words and the tone of voice in which I speak to others. And most of all, I can choose my thoughts.Elizabeth Gilbert
We shouldn’t compete against anyone other than ourselves. And we have a lot to choose from when it comes to our own lives. In lieu of that, what we can focus our time and energy on is making ourselves better, wiser, stronger, and more human. To better who we are. It’s not our neighbour, or the world that needs changing, it’s us who do. And when we better ourselves, little by little, the world around us improves too.
Sometimes when things are falling apart, they may actually be falling into place.Jennifer Lynn
You know it, often what we go through, and the experience is not desired either pleasant, it feels like the end of the world for us. We go through breakups, divorces, jobs being lost, companies shut down, bankruptcies, illnesses and other forms of painful experiences.
However, as these happen, we always label them as ‘the worst of all’, before we get to understand and acknowledge why it even happened and what it means for our lives. It’s way too often that we see the full picture — the outcome of such changes only once that they’re long passed. And then, we actually get to understand and appreciate their role in our lives.
Often, when something ends, it happens as it was needed, not because the universe wants to take something away from us. It’s because it wants to redirect us towards something better. When we lose, we learn so much about the loss that we succeed later or have better and healthier relationships. When we experience an illness, it teaches us so much about ourselves, often about our values that we change who we are for the better entirely through the experience.
What seems to be negative, is not always so as there’d be always something positive coming out of the experience. To better manage such occurrences, we should keep our minds open to this awareness.
Inner peace begins the moment you choose not to allow another person or event to control your emotions.Pema Chodron
This strongly relates to the ‘locus of control’ I was talking about two points back. The fact is that it’s not other people or occurrences that control how we think, feel, and who we are. We’re responsible for how we choose to think, feel, behave and act.
Therefore, we have the power within us, to choose whether we allow another person, or an event to have control over how we feel (and then act) or we won’t. We can choose to let go of what’s not good for ourselves, our physical and mental health, and overall wellbeing.
We’re the ones in power and the choice, too, is ours.
Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on Earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude.Thomas Jefferson
The secret to our success lies in our minds. And as much as it’s true that one can’t live a positive life with a negative mind, it’s also that one with a limiting mindset that constantly tells them about how something is not possible and how they can’t achieve it is not made to be a winner.
How could you succeed in something if you are constantly focusing on losing? But could you succeed if you focus your mental power on succeeding — thinking how you can make it happen while adding complementary feelings and actions to it?
Every morning we are born again, what we do today is what matters most.Buddha
If we were animals, this would be the one and only perception to life we would possess. We’d only focus on the now 24 hours a day, every day.
However, we’re humans. That makes us thinkers, analyzers, the people of the past, present, and future at once. And it complicates things for us too. Because when we focus more on our past and future than our present — the moments that we’re experiencing precisely now, we lose out on life altogether. We lose out on living fully. And we lose out on the potential of every new moment we’re in to be life-changing for us.
The truth is, we’re born every day and not only that. I dare to say that we’re born every moment because the only reality is this precise moment we’re living now. It’s not the past as that’s already gone, it’s non-existent anymore. And neither it is the future that may not happen the way we now visualize it too. And so we’re left with the present.
What we do now — how we think, what we feel, how we choose to behave and what we choose to do is what matters. There’s always something, even if small, that we can do at any point, to re-align our life with the life we want to have. And the best part is that we can do it immediately. It’s only a question of our choice.
Once you make a decision, the whole universe conspires to make it happen.Ralph Waldo Emerson
This needs no more clarification.
Hope you got inspired a little bit. Have a great day!